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A Guide on Enjoying Intimacy as You Age
The concept of intimacy changes as we age, and it can look completely different from how you viewed it in your 20s. However, you should experience and encourage intimacy in your everyday life as you age as well. Intimacy can be a powerful tool, and it can be extremely beneficial to your overall health. Intimacy should be a daily priority, but if you struggle to enjoy it as you age then here's a guide to making it a little easier.
Improve Communication Skills
Intimacy is an essential pillar of any healthy relationship. However, if your communication skills are lacking, you might have some issues in the intimacy department. Communication is an integral part of what your relationship needs in order to improve and stay healthy. Poor communication can cause conflicts and hinder the trust and openness of a relationship. If you want to enhance intimacy, then be playful when discussing sex.
If you struggle to communicate with your partner effectively, consider asking open-ended questions to dig a little deeper into getting to know one another again. Communication is more than just asking about each other’s workday, so make it a fun game to ask each other a personal question every day. Although this might seem silly, often couples become stagnant, so taking the time to be fully present with your partner will bring you both closer.
Pay Attention to Sexual Health
As you age, your sex drive will begin to change; however, that doesn’t mean that you'll no longer be interested in sex as you age. Some women and men will experience highs and lows with their desire to have sex at different points of their lives. Some women will start to feel a decline in their sex drive as they head toward menopause, while some men might see a decrease in their sexual drive when they start to experience erectile dysfunction (ED), which becomes more common around the age of 40.
This is why it’s important to discuss any sexual difficulties you might be facing because of your sexual health. There are many reasons why men struggle with ED, like underlying health issues such as diabetes, high cholesterol or even stress. If you’re struggling with ED, consider talking to a health care professional about ED medication options like Viagra or other treatment options.
If you’re a woman dealing with low libido or vaginal dryness, consider purchasing a water-based lubricant to ease any pain or talking to your doctor about hormones that can increase your sex drive. Stress can also play a part in a woman's sexual health, so if you’re experiencing higher than normal stress or anxiety, then try some mindfulness techniques to help you refocus.
Court One Another
Although you might be ready and excited to get intimate with your partner again, maintaining a spark takes work. Reconnect with your partner sexually and emotionally by making an effort to date one another again. This will help improve intimacy and remind each other why you’re in love. Start small by texting a midday love note to each other or going on a long walk without your phones. Start each morning with a kiss; a simple act of touching like hand holding or hugging will also calm the body and strengthen your romantic relationship. These small efforts will make a big difference in your relationship and have you looking forward to spending time with your partner.
You can also dedicate at least two nights a week to doing fun activities with your partner. Whether that means having a romantic dinner or having a paint night, it’s never too late to experience new and exciting activities with one another. Quality time can show how important it is to stay connected and shake up your day-to-day. Staying connected through your date night will make it easier for you to stay connected in the intimate aspect of your relationship, too.
Try to Embrace Desires
In order to enjoy intimacy as you age, you have to be open with sharing your desires and bedroom expectations. Expectations can mean many things, from sexual desires to removing the unrealistic expectations that make you feel uncomfortable. Although you might connect a successful sexual experience to both you and your partner reaching climax, you should focus more on the overall pleasure and experience. Removing expectations that make you feel pressure to perform perfectly will shift your focus to a more realistic approach and help you focus on what you want.
If you want to reconnect with yourself sexually but not sure how to get started, then take small steps like visiting an online sex shop that offers various toys designed for sex at an older age. Spending quality time with yourself or your partner naked can help you get more comfortable with the idea of experimenting, while also helping your confidence. If you’ve always been interested in role-playing, then talk to your partner about incorporating that. Although it can be difficult or nerve-wracking to discuss, it helps establish a safe space between you and your partner while also building confidence.
As you get older, there's a stigma that intimacy is not as important as it once was, however, that's far from the case! It’s vital that you experience and enjoy intimacy as you age to help better improve your mental and physical health, so embrace this new and exciting chapter in your life!